Unique Jokes.com, A funny blog…

There was a couple who were big over-spenders. They always
dreamed to spend holidays in Hawaii, but never able to save
any money to do so. One day they came with an idea — each
time they have sex, they will put $20.00 bill into piggy bank.
They bought the piggy, and followed that procedure for about
a year.

After that time, they decided that there is enough money for
their dream vacation and broke the piggy bank.

The husband looked at their savings and said: “Isn’t it strange.
Each time we had sex, I put $20.00 into piggy. But here we have
many $50.00 and a few $100.00 bills.”

The wife replied: “Do you think that everybody is as stingy as
you are?”

Osama bin Laden, not feeling well and concerned about his
mortality, goes to consult a psychic about the date of his
death. Closing her eyes and silently reaching into the realm
of the future she finds the answer.

“You will die on an American holiday.”

“Which one?” Osama bin Laden asks nervously.

“It doesn’t matter,” replied the psychic. “Whenever you die,
it will be an American holiday!”

An atheist complained to a friend, “Christians have their special
holidays, such as Christmas and Easter; and Jewish folks celebrate
their holidays, such as Passover and Yom Kippur. EVERY religion
has its holidays. But we atheists,” he said, “have no recognized
national holidays. It’s unfair discrimination.”

His friend replied, “Well…Why don’t you celebrate April first?”

To: All Employees
From: Management
Subject: Office conduct during the Christmas season

Effective immediately, employees should keep in mind the following
guidelines in compliance with FROLIC (the Federal Revelry Office
and Leisure Industry Council).

1. Running aluminum foil through the paper shredder to make tinsel
is discouraged.

2. Playing Jingle Bells on the push-button phone is forbidden (it
runs up an incredible long distance bill)

3. Work requests are not to be filed under “Bah humbug.”

4. Company cars are not to be used to go over the river and through
the woods to Grandma’s house.

5. All fruitcake is to be eaten BEFORE July 25.

6. Egg nog will NOT be dispensed in vending machines.

In spite of all this, the staff is encouraged to have a Happy Holiday.

Happy Holidays!

It has begun!!!

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You have just been hit with an e-mail snow ball!
(The first one of the winter.)

It’s the start of….. Snow Ball Fight 2001-2002 !!!!

One rule to this game….

You can’t hit someone who has already hit you!

Now… go out there and get as many people as you can,
before they get you!
I got you first! and you can’t get me back!

We do not stop playing because we grow old; we
grow old because we stop playing.

Happy Holidays!!!!!