Archive for the 'Funny Ads' Category



Real news headlines 06


h1 Thursday, July 14th, 2005

These are actual newspaper headlines gathered from papers across the country.

Lansing Residents Can Drop Off Trees

Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half

New Vaccine May Contain Rabies

Man Minus Ear Waives Hearing

Deaf College Opens Doors to Hearing

Air Head Fired

Steals Clock, Faces Time

Prosecutor Releases Probe into Undersheriff

Old School Pillars are Replaced by Alumni

Bank Drive-in Window Blocked by Board

Real news headlines 05


h1 Thursday, July 14th, 2005

These are actual newspaper headlines gathered from papers across the country.

Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead

Man Struck by Lightning Faces Battery Charge

New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group

Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft

Kids Make Nutritious Snacks

Chef Throws His Heart into Helping Feed Needy

Arson Suspect is Held in Massachusetts Fire

British Union Finds Dwarfs in Short Supply

Ban On Soliciting Dead in Trotwood

Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors

Real news headlines 04


h1 Thursday, July 14th, 2005

These are actual newspaper headlines gathered from papers across the country.

Killer Sentenced to Die for Second Time in 10 Years

Never Withhold Herbes Infection from Loved One

Drunken Drivers Paid $1000 in ‘84

War Dims Hope for Peace

If Strike Isn’t Settled Quickly, It May Last a While

Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures

Enfields Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide

Red Tape Holds Up New Bridge

Dear Kill 17,000

Some Pieces of Rock Hudson Sold at Auction

Real news headlines 03


h1 Thursday, July 14th, 2005

These are actual newspaper headlines gathered from papers across the country.

Squad Helps Dog Bite Victim

Shot Off Woman’s leg Helps Nicklaus to 66

Enraged Cow Injures Farmer with Ax

Plane Too Close to Ground, Crash Probe Told

Miners Refuse to Work After Death

Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant

Stolen Painting Found by Tree

Two Soviet Ships Collide, One Dies

Two Sisters Reunited after 18 Years in Checkout Counter

Real news headlines 02


h1 Thursday, July 14th, 2005

These are actual newspaper headlines gathered from papers across the country.

Stud Tires Out

Prostitutes Appeal to Pope

Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over

Soviet Virgin Lands Short of Goal Again

British Left Waffles on Falkland islands

Lung Cancer in Women Mushrooms

Eye Drops off Shelf

Teacher Strikes Idle Kids

Reagan Wins on Budget, But More Lies Ahead