SUNDAY SERMON….
July 15th, 2005
A local preacher was dissatisfied with the the
small amount in the collection plates each Sunday.
Someone suggested to him that perhaps he might be
able to hypnotize the congregation into giving more.
“And just how would I go about doing that?” he asked.
It is very simple. First you turn down the air
conditioner so that the auditorium is warmer than
usual. Then you preach in a monotone. Meanwhile,
you dangle a watch on a chain and swing it in a slow
arc above the lectern and suggest they put 20 dollars
in the collection plate.
So the very next Sunday, the reverned did as suggested,
and low and behold the plates were full of 20 dollar
bills. Now, the preacher did not want to take advantage
of this technique each and every Sunday. So therefore,
he waited for a couple of weeks and then tried his mass
hypnosis again.
Just as the last of the congregation was becoming
mesmerized, the chain on the watch broke and the watch
hit the lecturn with a loud thud and springs and parts
flew everywhere.
“Crap!” exclaimed the pastor.
It took them a week to clean up the church.